


Ironic

by elemie89



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fake Marriage, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Green Card Marriage, Mutual Pining, Pining, Twitter Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2020-09-01 00:53:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20249458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elemie89/pseuds/elemie89
Summary: During the same dinner Rey planned to finally tell her long-time best friend that she loves him, Ben tells her he’s getting married. What he doesn’t tell her is that it’s a green card wedding for a platonic friend, and he’s doing it as a favor.





	1. Ironic

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome one and all to my newest fic. Yes I'm still updating my others. I just couldn't resist this prompt from [@reylo_prompts](https://twitter.com/reylo_prompts): “During the same dinner Rey planned to finally tell her long-time best friend that she loves him, Ben tells her he’s getting married. What he doesn’t tell her is that it’s a green card wedding for a platonic friend, and he’s doing it as a favor. Bonus points if it’s Hux, and Rey’s even more confused because as far as she knew, Ben isn’t attracted to men." 
> 
> Many thanks to [commandercrouton](https://archiveofourown.org/users/commandercrouton/pseuds/commandercrouton) and [katieitsmee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/katieitsmee/pseuds/katieitsmee) for beta'ing this <3

__It's like rain on your wedding day  
It's a free ride when you've already paid  
It's the good advice that you just didn't take  
Who would've thought, it figures

_ \- "**Ironic", Alanis Morrisette** _

A day late and a dollar short, these are the words that have summed up Rey Kenobi’s life. She comes by it honestly, though. Her grandfather Ben—God rest his soul—never failed to remind her that her parents—God rest their souls—always jokingly lamented that Rey was born January 1st at 12:01 am, effectively canceling any tax breaks they were looking forward to. In third grade, just after her parents passed away in a car accident, Rey was looking forward to a class trip to the aquarium. It was her bright spot in all the chaos. Grandpa Ben, bless him, forgot to sign her permission slip and turn it in until the day after it was due. Rey had the misfortune of having a hardass for a teacher and stayed home with Grandpa Ben while her friends fed sea lions. In college, she fell asleep before submitting her paperwork for the study abroad program and woke up past the midnight deadline. No amount of begging changed the registrar’s mind. So on and so forth, Rey’s life was littered with examples of how she missed her shot with lots of things. Tonight was no exception. 

“I...,” Rey says chewing her thumbnail, surveying herself in the bathroom mirror, “think I’m gonna tell Ben how I feel tonight.” 

Rose Tico, her best friend is passing by the bathroom at that moment. “I’m sorry can you repeat that? I think I just had a stroke and heard you say you were going to grow some balls and finally tell Ben Solo you’ve wanted to climb him like the tree he is for the past five years?” 

Rey cringes. “It sounds so crass when you put it that way.” 

“It’s the truth!” Rose pauses and yells into the living room. “Hey Kay! Our baby is finally manning up and telling Ben how she feels!” 

“What?!” comes a shriek from the living room. 

Kaydel Connix, Rey’s other friend and roommate, comes bounding into the hall. “Ohmigosh, Rey...seriously?!” 

Rey nods. Kaydel and Rose squeal, clap hands and jump up and down. 

“Umm hello?” Rey waves at them, bringing their attention back to her. 

“Sorry,” Kaydel says sheepishly. “So what are you gonna say?!” 

“I don’t know...I hadn’t really thought that far.” 

“So why now?” Rose persists with the interrogation. 

“Well, I was on that date with that guy from Bumble and I just kept thinking, ‘He doesn’t do this like Ben’ and ‘He doesn’t do that like Ben’ and then I just realized why do I keep bothering? None of these guys are Ben, none of these guys will ever be Ben, so...why don’t I just go after Ben? Does that sound stupid?” 

“No,” Kaydel says with raised eyebrows, “that’s actually kinda deep.” 

“Yeah,” Rose says in wonder. 

Rey still remembers the day she realized she had feelings for Ben. They were childhood friends. Grandpa Ben knew Ben’s parents from way back. Ever since meeting in kindergarten, they’ve been inseparable. They went to school together, went to the same college and even got jobs at the same company in their hometown of Boston together. 

It was a random Tuesday night when Rey first realized her feelings. She and some friends from work go to partake in Taco Tuesday at a local Mexican establishment. The table was on their second pitcher of margaritas when the usual complaints about significant others and children starts. 

“At least you all have someone. I just have friends, other than that...I’m alone!” Rey says a little too cheerfully for the sentiment of that statement. 

“Why don’t you date Ben?” a random co-worker probes. 

Rey doesn’t have an answer. Mercifully, one co-worker chimes in that Ben is gorgeous. Rey will concede that fact. Rey’s always told him he’s handsome because it’s true and he’s always told her she’s pretty when she’s feeling low because that’s what best friends do. The table has now devolved into gushing compliments about the collective office crush and Rey’s best friend. At that moment she was grateful for that chatter and distraction so that no one could see the blush on her face. 

From there, things spiraled. Rey was soon engulfed in the fog of a new crush. The word sounded so childish, but she didn’t know what else to call it. She couldn’t call it love because she wasn’t  _ in love _ with him—was she? 

Rey always meant to confess her feelings.  _ Honestly!  _ The timing, however, was never right. Ben’s father passed away shortly after that fateful Tuesday. After that it was always something—the holidays were coming, things were crazy at work, one of them was about to go on a business trip, and a few times Ben had started dating other women. It was always something. Before she knows it, Rey looks up and five years of pining for Ben Solo had passed. 

That all ends tonight. She’s doing this, consequences be damned. She’s no longer content to keep this secret. It eats her up inside every day. The mental restraint it takes to keep her hands to herself or to not stare at him is catching up with her and exhausts her to no end. Pretending to be interested in wanting to date other guys also wears her down. It wears on her to the point where her single point of hesitation—ruining their friendship—is of little consequence. She’s tired of the games. She’s done.

Despite her earlier bravado about this whole situation, being in the Uber on the way to the pizza place they frequent every Friday night like clockwork causes a new wave of panic to wash over her.  _ What if this is the last Friday night dinner we have because I’m a lovelorn idiot who just can’t learn to bottle up her feelings like a normal person?  _ Rey only half-surprises herself with her fatalistic thoughts. In the back of her mind, there’s always been that fear, that hesitation which is why it’s taken her five years to do this. Ben’s always been there for her through it all and she would hate to lose his friendship. She hopes he isn’t the type to cut and run after she makes things awkward by confessing her feelings. 

Her Uber pulls up to the pizza place and Rey surveys it quickly before getting out.  _ The scene of the crime _ , she thinks as she hops out. As far as Ben is concerned, this is a normal Friday, so Rey reminds herself to act casual and not be weird. 

Paulie’s is your average run-of-the-mill pizza place on an unassuming street, nothing special as far as decor goes. It’s a simple place with brick walls and photos of celebrities from a bygone era with a grey-haired short man—Rey assumes that’s Paulie—on the wall. The green leather seats of the booths are cracked in places from years of use, but the seats are still comfortable. Ben and Rey found this place years ago after a night of too many drinks. They stumbled down the street that night, lost, trying to find the next bar. Once they saw Paulie’s, they quickly forgot about their friends and satisfied their hunger. They came back the following Friday night because it was the only place for dinner they could agree on without much argument. The rest, as they say, is history. 

Ben is already seated when Rey enters the restaurant—early as always. He greets her with a wave, and she heads over toward the booth. She feels lightheaded as she slides in, the weight of what she’s about to do becoming more apparent. 

She looks up at Ben with a smile and he’s looking at her expectantly. Shit, he must have said something and Rey didn’t catch it. “I’m sorry?” 

Ben smirks. “I ordered you a Diet Coke already.”

“Oh thanks,” she sighs and relaxes into the seat. 

“You okay?” 

Rey freezes. She can’t launch into her big speech that she made up in the Uber just yet. They haven’t even ordered garlic knots yet. “I’m fine. Long week at work.” 

A waitress who’s never waited on them at this place before saves her from further explanation. “Hey...I see your girlfriend finally showed up!” 

“Oh we’re not…” they both say in unison. 

_ This is going to go well,  _ Rey thinks as Ben orders their appetizer and the same slices he orders every week—margherita because it’s the closest thing to authentic Italian pizza in the States, thank you very much. 

Rey purses her lips and studies the menu. She practically has it memorized but is always paralyzed by indecision when the time comes to order. 

“You wanted the buffalo chicken last week, but didn’t get it,” Ben says to her while answering a text or email on his phone. 

“How did you…?” 

“You ask me what you wanted but didn’t order last week, every week.” 

Rey shakes her head and orders a buffalo chicken slice. After the waitress leaves, Ben launches into an enthusiastic review of a Netflix documentary he watched last night as they wait for their food. Rey is happy about this. Mainly because Ben is doing all the talking. Also, he’s just so  _ adorable _ when he’s talking about something he’s passionate about. His brows furrow, his hands are animated and the Beacon Hill Boston accent he tries to suppress jumps out. It’s infectious and irresistible. 

The waitress returns with their appetizers and slices. Rey tears into hers and Ben begins working on his with a fork and knife. After taking a few bites of their food, Rey is contemplating whether or not now is the time to say something. She’s lost in her thoughts when Ben clears his throat. 

“Actually I need to tell you something,” he says, dabbing his mouth with his napkin. 

_ Huh? No, I’m the one with something to tell you.  _ “Okay, and...kinda funny, I have something to tell you, as well.” 

Ben seems taken aback at this. “Oh?”

Rey fiddles with her straw. “But you go first…” 

Something compels her to say that. She’s not sure why, as if Ben’s news will stop her from spilling her guts all over Paulie’s—which she might actually do. Maybe Ben’s moving. Maybe Ben met someone. There’s a lot of thoughts swirling in her head and they’re all of self-preservation.  _ Wait. Not now _ . 

She’s confident in her decision. Until Ben opens his mouth. 

“Okay,” he says, huffing out a breath. “I’m getting married.” 

Rey blinks. Did she just hear him right?  _ Married? _ “I’m sorry, I think I just heard you say you’re getting married.” 

“Yep.” 

“Married?” 

“Married.” 

“Married? As in white dress, black tux?  _ Dun dun duh duh _ ?” she asks, humming the first few notes of Wagner’s “Bridal Chorus”. 

“All that,” Ben nods. 

Rey sits back in the booth and the leather squishes under her back. “Huh.” 

Married? As far as she knows, Ben hasn’t been seeing anybody—which was one of her strident criteria for telling him. She tries to wrack her brain for some clue he might have given her that he was in a relationship serious enough and progressing toward a walk down the aisle. Rey comes up empty. She’s also trying to squash the crippling sense of despair that’s rising up in her. 

“Please say something,” Ben looks frozen in the same spot he was when he first dropped this bombshell on her. Rey realizes she’s probably taking too long to respond. 

“Sorry, just...huh?” 

Ben picks at his glass of water and scoffs. “Yeah, I know it’s kind of sudden.” 

“You’re telling me. I didn’t even know you were dating anyone. Which, what the hell man?” she says, reaching to playfully swat his arm.  _ Act casual, everything is fine.  _

Ben smiles at her gesture. “Sorry, it all just happened sort of quickly. I didn’t have time to sit you down and explain everything.” 

“I mean, I’ll forgive you... _ eventually _ , you just need to take me to Freedom Creamery and let me order the biggest sundae to sweeten the deal,” Rey says taking another bite of her slice. It’s going to take a lot more than ice cream to soothe this wound. 

“You would…” Ben says shaking his head. 

“Hey, I’m not the one who forgot to tell his best friend he was seriously dating someone,” Rey says with a quirked eyebrow. 

“That’s…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Rey says with a wave of her hand.  _ Everything is fine.  _ “So who’s the lucky girl?” 

“Guy,” Ben mumbles into his drink. 

“Huh?” 

“It’s…” Ben begins as he sucks in another breath. “It’s Armitage.” 

If Rey thought she was confused before, it’s nothing compared to the confusion she feels right now. Ben is marrying Armitage Hux? Hux, as he likes to be called, is another co-worker of Ben and Rey’s. He’s closer to Ben. Rey barely knows the man other than he’s tall, ginger, and pasty. He’s also a guy. 

The fact that Ben is getting married, and not just married, but to another man? Rey’s finding it hard to keep her composure. In the twenty years they’ve been friends, Ben has never expressed any same-sex attraction.  _ Sexuality is a spectrum and maybe Hux was his sexual awakening _ , she ponders forlornly. 

After a few minutes, Rey looks up from the table and Ben’s once again looking at her expectantly. Right, she should probably say something. 

“But you’re not gay,” is the first thing that slips out. She immediately wishes she could take it back. Her best friend—who she happens to be in love with—just came out to her, admitted he’s in love with another man, and wants to marry him. How can Rey be so callous? “I’m sorry, that was the wrong thing to say.” 

Ben shifts in his seat, opens his mouth to say something, but shakes his head. What ever he was going to say, he just tells her it’s ok instead. 

Rey slides her hand across the table and places a reassuring hand on Ben’s wrist. “I’m happy for you.” 

“Thanks,” he offers her a sheepish smile. 

Rey’s smile at Ben in this moment is genuine. What she wants doesn’t matter. It  _ can’t  _ matter. Not when Ben is happy. He deserves someone who can make him happy, even if it’s not Rey. 

He releases a breath he’s been holding in. “So, you, uh, wanted to tell me something?” 

Right, she was going to tell Ben she’s been hopelessly in love with him for years when she wasn’t really his type to begin with. What a stupid plan, but one she’s glad she hesitated to go through with. She can deal with the heartbreak. It’s fine, really. No big deal that Ben doesn’t want her. Making an absolute fool out of herself would have been unbearable. 

“Oh, uh, it’s nothing...I was just gonna, uh, show you pictures of the haircut I was thinking about getting, but let’s talk about wedding planning!” she says, twisting the knife in her own heart harder.

Ben seems like he’s forgotten that particular detail. Somehow it’s escaped his brilliant brain that he should put some thought into planning his own wedding. 

He runs his fingers through his hair. “We’re going to keep it simple...at least that’s what we talked about.” 

“Justice of the Peace...all that?” Rey probes even further. At this point it’s morbid curiosity that compels her to keep asking questions about this damn wedding. She knows she should stop, but she can’t help torturing herself. Fucking masochist. 

“Maybe just like dinner at a nice restaurant after,” Ben says offhand. 

Rey feels the rational part of her brain telling her to shut up, be quiet, no more discussing this, but she can’t. A sick urge to make Ben happy just won’t allow her. “Oh come on, you can’t just leave it at that. It’s your wedding day! You have to have a little party.” 

“That’s not…” 

“Please? It’s the least I can do for my best friend,” she says. She knows her eyes are wide, pleading. She just wants Ben to be happy. Even if it means helping him plan his wedding to someone else. 

“Okay,” he sighs. “Hux  _ is  _ going out of town and we need—want to get married in two weeks. I guess I could use your help.” 

“I’m your girl,”  _ For fucks sake, Rey, shut your mouth and stop saying stupid shit that’s going to make you cry. _

On the outside she’s smiling. On the inside, she’s angry. Angry at herself. How could she have missed that her best friend was (also?) attracted to men. Were there signs that just flew right over her head? Was she so wrapped up in her attraction for Ben—seeing him through her own brand of rose-colored glasses—that she couldn’t see what was obvious? Rey brings her hand to bite her cuticle, but she stops when she realizes that biting is just this side of painful. Curse her nervous habits. Curse this dinner. Rey needs to leave. Now. 

“Um,” she begins, her voice soft and small, “can you excuse me for just a second?” 

“Sure,” Ben says with a nod. “Are you ok?” 

“Haven’t been feeling well today. That’s all,” she responds and she’s not even sure if she believes herself. 

“If you wanna take off, I can get the bill,” Ben offers. 

Her mind swings between how she doesn’t deserve Ben and god does she hate him. It doesn’t stop her from giving him a hug goodbye after she orders her Uber. A dramatic fatalistic feeling sweeps over Rey while she hugs him tells him this is one of the last hugs she’ll share with Ben before everything changes. It bids her to memorize every sensation and smell. She’s knows once he’s married things will change. She still tells Finn and Rose everything and sees them regularly, but when they got married two years ago, the tenor of their relationship changed. That change will come with Ben. 

That’s what tips her over the edge. The tears she’s been holding, the anger that’s been threatening to boil over, it catches up with her suddenly and all at once. She can’t fight the lump in her throat anymore and all but bolts out of the pizza place after breaking away from Ben. 

It feels like an eternity before her driver shows up, when in reality the car is just around the block. She’s biting the inside of her cheek, praying no tears come out before she pulls away from the curb. That’s the last thing she needs tonight—looks of pity or disdain from strangers. Her body mercifully complies and the first tear falls after she buckles her seatbelt. Always a day late and a dollar short.

  
  



	2. Let Her Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm blown away by the response to this fic. Thank you guys! 
> 
> Also, special shout out to [commandercrouton](https://archiveofourown.org/users/commandercrouton/works) and [katieitsmee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/katieitsmee/pseuds/katieitsmee) for the beta read.

_You see her when you close your eyes_  
_Maybe one day you'll understand why_  
_Everything you touch surely dies_

** _\- "Let Her Go", Passenger_ **

To put it mildly, Ben Solo is fucked. His life lately has been full of moments of things he _ should _ have done, but ultimately didn’t. He _ should _ have gone after Rey and told her the full story a week ago at Paulie’s, but he didn’t. He just sat, rooted in his spot, and let his best friend believe the lie Hux and he had been perpetuating. He _ should _have told his mom no thank you when she called and offered to help with the wedding planning. Ben said yes, knowing full well that Leia Organa-Solo’s brand of wedding planning would include an opulent reception at a five-star hotel with all of her important friends in attendance. Ultimately, he should have said no when Hux asked him to marry him, his green card situation be damned. 

_  
_

That’s how he finds himself in a floral shop with Rey, a week away from the big day. Ben is cursing the fact that he couldn’t say no to anyone and cursing the fact that Hux conveniently needs to be in England for another three days. 

_  
_

As Ben watches Rey move among the flower displays, lightly touching petals as she goes, he supposes it’s not all bad. Rey—bless her—wonderfully agreed to help, no questions asked. She had dubbed today “Mission: Wedding Impossible” because they’re attempting to get everything in order for the wedding...today. They’ve determined that whatever can’t be sorted today isn’t necessary for the wedding. He’s not sure how he got so lucky to have a best friend like her, but he’s never thought it a good idea to question how fate brought them together. 

_  
_

He’d wanted to tell her the truth after springing the news on her, but when she showed up at his condo the next day with brochures for various reception halls (she was probably conspiring with his mother, but that’s neither here nor there), he didn’t have the heart to tell her the whole story. 

_  
_

He tells himself it’s better this way. After they get married, immigration officials will probably be sniffing around and interviewing their friends. Rey has a terrible poker face. It’s probably best if he doesn’t tell her. If it’s the right thing to do, why does that sit so wrong with him? 

_  
_

In the middle of looking at simple floral arrangements, his phone pings and he looks down. It’s his long-time friend, Poe Dameron. _ Fucking Dameron _, he thinks. Ironically, that’s how he finds himself in this particular predicament.

_  
_

Up until about six weeks ago, Hux had been dating Poe. Ben had introduced them four years prior when Poe was Leia’s date at a cocktail party they all got roped in to. Ben was ecstatic that he’d actually done something right for a change by playing Cupid. They seemed destined for their own walk down the aisle when it ended suddenly. From what Ben could determine, it was an argument over whether or not Poe would eventually be willing to move to the UK. Ben gleaned that it devolved into misunderstandings, name calling, and hurt feelings. 

_  
_

This all led to Hux showing up on Ben’s doorstep drunk at two am. He’d been living there ever since. In the chaos of the break-up, Hux had forgotten to file for an extension for his work visa. 

_  
_

Ben found him one morning about two weeks ago, sitting at his kitchen table. Hux told Ben that his only option was to return to England and re-apply. 

_  
_

“It’s either that or I find some idiot to marry me so I can stay here,” Hux lamented with his head in his hands. 

_  
_

Ben knew the pain Hux was going through after leaving Poe. He also knew Poe was still hopelessly in love with Hux. People had accused Ben of being a heartless bastard in the past, but in that moment with Hux crying at his kitchen table, he turned into the biggest hopeless romantic ever. A fine moment to change, indeed. That was when he should have said no, kept his mouth shut, but he didn’t. 

_  
_

“Poe just confirmed to be our other witness in front of the justice of the peace,” Ben says, centering his thoughts back to the present. 

_  
_

“Great!” Rey beams at him. “I told you it would all come together.” 

_  
_

“You were right,” he replies, pocketing his phone. 

_  
_

They choose a simple arrangement for the catering table without much fuss. After paying for the flowers, Ben turns to Rey. 

_  
_

“Okay, so what’s next?” 

_  
_

Rey smirks at him. “Cake.” 

_  
_

“You would get excited about cake,” he teases. 

_  
_

“So, I know you like vanilla cake with plain buttercream because you’re boring, but what’s Hux’s favorite kind of cake?” Rey asks with a laugh. 

_  
_

Ben pauses. Shit. He really should know this. He says the first thing that pops into his brain. “Chocolate.” 

_  
_

Rey looks surprised, but seems to take Ben at his word...he knows best, after all—even though Ben isn’t sure Hux has eaten cake in the last five years. 

_  
_

Minutes later, they’re sitting in a bakery, ready to sample their wares. Ben finds himself quite overwhelmed by the whole thing. He didn’t know this many flavors of cakes existed (what the hell is doberge cake?!). 

_  
_

“Ugh,” Rey all but moans as she takes a bite of the red velvet sample. “This cake is so good it’s practically orgasmic.” 

_  
_

Ben’s brain ceases to work in that moment. The noise Rey made coupled with talk of orgasms stirs something in him. Why is he thinking about hearing her moan like that again? Even worse—why does he want to be the one that makes her do it? _ Get a hold of yourself, she thinks you’re marrying another man in a week and a half, _the rational side of his brain pleads. 

_  
_

“There are _ children _ present,” he finally manages. 

_  
_

Rey rolls her eyes as she takes another bite. “You’re taking this far too seriously.” 

_  
_

“I’m getting married…” 

_  
_

“It’s a cake tasting!” Rey gestures wildly. “It’s supposed to be fun.” 

_  
_

Ben rolls his eyes and laughs. He opens his mouth to say something, but Rey shuts him up by covering the tip of his nose with frosting. 

_  
_

“Did you seriously just…?” 

_  
_

Rey nods like the cat who ate the canary. Before Ben can promise revenge, the cake consultant returns to their table. 

_  
_

“Have we made a selection?” He asks. he obviously sees Ben’s frosting-covered nose because immediately after speaking, he purses his lips together and sighs. 

_  
_

“You’re so dead,” he mouths before turning around. 

_  
_

“Red velvet,” Rey says quickly before he can speak. 

_  
_

“Is that okay, sir?” the consultant confirms. 

_  
_

Ben turns to Rey, “Whatever she wants.” 

_  
_

There’s something a little more serious behind his voice. What it is, Ben can’t unpack all that right now. Rey’s looking at him and there’s something more meaningful about it, more weighted. Ben gulps down the water the bakery provided him with, but it’s not enough to have him forget about the shift in the atmosphere. 

_  
_

The silence between them as they wait for Ben’s order to be processed is deafening despite the din from other patrons in the bakery. The consultant couldn’t be moving any slower and Ben is overthinking every word he’s said today. It’s utterly painful. He’s silently thanking God that this is their last stop and he can drop Rey at her apartment after this. Moments later, Ben signs on the dotted line and the cake is confirmed. 

_  
_

“We just have one more stop to make,” Rey says quietly as they’re walking to his car. 

_  
_

Ben shoots her a confused look. 

_  
_

“It’s…for me. Your mother’s request,” she shrugs. 

_  
_

Rey keeps quiet about their destination, but Ben dutifully follows her phone’s navigation. When they arrive and Ben sees where his mother told Rey to go, he audibly groans. 

_  
_

“I’m sorry!” she says, defensively. 

_  
_

Ben shakes his head and laughs. “I know...it’s not your fault. I’m assuming she told you not to tell me that we were going to a bridal shop to get you a proper dress for the wedding.” 

_  
_

Rey nods. “That’s exactly it.” 

_  
_

Ben silently chuckles and runs a hand through his hair. He looks up at the sign on the storefront—Maz’s Bridal Boutique. He shakes his head and opens his car door. “Lets go.” 

_  
_

“I’ll be quick, I swear,” Rey says, following him. 

_  
_

A chime sounds when Ben opens the door for Rey. They enter a small waiting area with upscale tan ottomans. Just beyond is a room stuffed full of more tulle and taffeta than Ben thinks should be allowed in one place. A few mannequins are set up with sample dresses to entice brides to be. Ben wants to run for the door. 

_  
_

“I’ll be right there,” a voice from the fitting room area calls. 

_  
_

They wait a few seconds in the waiting area before a voice disrupts the silence. “Ben Solo!” 

_  
_

Ben smirks and turns toward the source of the voice. “Hey, Maz.” 

_  
_

“Your mother told me to expect you! Allow me to congratulate you,” she says, taking Ben’s hand and shaking it. 

_  
_

“Thanks,” he says quickly. 

_  
_

“Although, I’m surprised that you’re accompanying the bride. Bad luck, you know,” she says with a wink. 

_  
_

“Oh we’re not…” Ben and Rey correct her in unison, then look at each other with an awkward laugh. 

_  
_

“My apologies,” Maz says with a sly smile. 

_  
_

“I’m looking for my Best Woman dress. Yeah. I guess that’s what my title is?” Rey shrugs with a smile. 

_  
_

Ben looks at her for a second and pauses. Has Rey always had dimples when she smiles? Have they always looked that adorable? Where are these thoughts coming from? Ben shakes his head and dismisses them as thoughts that seep in when one is tired. 

_  
_

“I have just the thing,” Maz says, grabbing Rey’s hand and leading her to another section of the shop. 

_  
_

Ben takes a seat on a couch sitting next to one of the mannequins. Another man is sitting a few away on an identical couch. He offers Ben a sympathetic nod, as if they are in this experience together. He’d often heard of his father’s years of service in the “Purse Holding Squad”. Ben assumes he can now call himself a card carrying member as he sets Rey’s bag down next to him. 

_  
_

He responds to an e-mail while waiting and nearly drops his phone when Rey emerges from the fitting rooms. The color pink was never on Ben’s radar, that was more Poe’s department. Black or grey ruled his wardrobe. As Rey walks toward him, he decides pink is the most beautiful color he’s ever seen. 

_  
_

Her shoulders are hunched over and she has an expectant smile on her face. Ben knows she’s nervous and she’s looking at him for approval. Ben more than approves.

_  
_

“What do you think?” she asks hopefully. 

_  
_

Ben still can’t speak, but he manages words as he clears his throat. “It’s...it’s nice.” 

_  
_

He shouldn’t be studying the way the pink dress accentuates her curves perfectly. He shouldn’t be thinking about how—even in a messy bun, without a stitch of makeup—she’s probably the most beautiful woman in the shop, or Boston. or ever. He _ definitely _ shouldn’t be thinking about how much he’d love to take that dress off of her. 

_  
_

He reminds himself he’s getting married, and his brain supplies him with a vision of that day. But it’s totally different than what he’s been picturing the last few days. Instead of standing in some stuffy courthouse—standing next to Hux, lying—he’s at the Botanical Gardens. A string quartet is playing and Rey—his best friend, Rey—is walking down the aisle toward him with a shy smile. She’s wearing a simple dress she’d been eyeing while they were waiting. A sensation Ben can only describe as the infamous butterflies in his stomach intensifies. 

_  
_

He can’t help but feel like a cliché at this very moment. He’s surprised he doesn’t see Rey walk towards him in slow motion, soft lighting gracing her form, and a fan blowing her chestnut curls. The truth, which he’d been subconsciously pushing down, couldn’t hide anymore. Ben’s in love. 

_  
_

He’s in love with Rey, his best friend, and the timing couldn’t be worse. 

_  
_

The same twist of fate that brought them together has now turned cruel, leaving only his broken heart in its wake. Ben briefly toys with the idea of baring his soul here in this bridal shop, but the idea quickly sours. It’s selfish, Ben decides, to profess a love he barely knew the existence of less than an hour ago. 

_  
_

His grandmother always taught him to follow his thoughts through to a conclusion. The two options he sees laid before him only bring heartache. He reminds himself why he’s in this damn bridal shop with visions of Rey walking down the aisle to him in his head—he’s doing Hux a favor. Hux reconciling with Poe is more of a guarantee and less of a risk than whatever this is with Rey. 

_  
_

This is the path he has to choose. If Rey wants him, he can’t ask her to wait three years until Hux is all settled. He also can’t ask her to be some dirty little secret during those years either. None of the above would be fair to her. She’s that special kind of woman who deserves to be shown off and cherished—immediately. Ben knew that from the day he met her. He’s kicking himself for taking so long to realize he’s been in love with her. 

_  
_

“Okay, that’s all set,” she says, after they check out. “Wanna go back to your place, get take out, and binge _ Parks and Rec _?” 

_  
_

“Again?” Ben laughs. 

_  
_

“Don’t pretend like you don’t aspire to be Ron Swanson,” Rey teases with a quirked eyebrow. 

_  
_

“He has his charms,” Ben relents with a smirk. “Okay, but you’re paying for takeout.” 

_  
_

“Deal.” 

_  
_

“And remember, I still need to get you back for the frosting on the nose.” 

_  
_

She just rolls her eyes and laughs. “Sure, Ben.” 

_  
_

Dinner at Ben’s apartment is nice. The stress he’s been feeling about this debacle he’s gotten himself into has all but melted. However, being with Rey seems more weighted now in the light of his revelation from this afternoon. Everything is heightened—every innocent glance or touch brings new emotions he never thought he would feel. Ben loves it and hates it. It’s almost enough to make him glad that he’ll have to push her away. It also breaks his heart. 

_  
_

He’s being pushed and pulled. There’s too many contradictions about the whole situation. He can’t seem to ignore his brain’s civil war. It’s maddening. 

_  
_

Rey rests her head on Ben’s shoulder at some point. He hesitates before draping his arm over her, like he’s done so many times before.

_  
_

Ben’s brain isn’t that far gone that he can’t spot a perfect opportunity to exact vengeance for earlier. He traces lazy circles on her arm, lulling her into a false sense of security. Then, he goes for the kill—tickling her sides. 

_  
_

That jolts Rey from her sleep and she begins giggling. She moves away from Ben, but he just begins tickling her other side. She protests between her giggles and flops down on the couch. Ben doesn’t relent as he moves to hover over her. 

_  
_

“Ben! Stop!” she cries nearly breathless from laughter. 

_  
_

He stops for just a second to let her catch her breath, but his impulsive mind has other plans. She looks so beautiful beneath him. It would be so easy to just steal a kiss from her right now. So easy. His baser instincts are calling him to take what he wants. 

_  
_

He hesitates a moment, but he listens. God help him, he listens to his that damn voice telling him to take what he wants and presses a kiss to her lips. A whimper of surprise escapes from her. Her hands are pressed up against his chest, as if she can’t decide if she wants this or not. The guilt eventually gets to him and Ben pulls away. 

_  
_

He’s about to apologize, say whatever he needs to say to make this right. He can’t make the words come out right now. They’re just gazing into each other’s eyes, anticipating the other’s move, their breathing slowly returning to normal. She looks at him like her mind is waging its own war. Her eyes are on his lips. Is she _ really _ thinking about kissing him back? It feels like they’ve been like this for twenty years, even though it’s only been twenty seconds. 

_  
_

She’s the first to break their silent stalemate. As she releases a breath, she grabs his t-shirt with one hand and pulls him in. She laces the fingers of her other hand through his hair. This moment—it’s everything Ben never knew he wanted. There’s no hesitation, like one has when locking lips with their best friend. They’re just diving into this thing—whatever it is, headfirst without any reservations. 

_  
_

Ben wants to stay here forever, with their tongues playfully sparring and Rey moaning into their kisses. It’s almost as good as the noises she made with the cake earlier in the day and Ben’s errant thoughts run to how he can keep eliciting them from her. It’s almost enough to forget he’s getting married. _ Almost. _

_  
_

The feeling of guilt seeps back in, but he doesn’t stop kissing Rey. He knows he’s a selfish bastard for doing this. It’s so wrong, but it feels so right. He can do penance later. What he’s doing for Hux and Poe is a selfless act. Before he becomes a literal monk for at least three years, Ben deserves to have something for himself. 

_  
_

That’s how he rationalizes doing this—taking like the selfish bastard he is with no thoughts of future consequences. At least one of them is thinking about the future. Rey makes a noise of protest from under him and her hands press up against Ben’s chest. Ben pulls away from her as she says “no”. He sits back on the couch and Rey quickly pops up. 

_  
_

Damn him for not thinking about the consequences earlier. Rey’s eyes are glistening with the threat of tears. 

_  
_

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I’m so sorry.” 

_  
_

Rey’s lips are drawn into a tight line. Ben knows that look. She’s bottling up all her emotions and he knows it’s for his benefit. 

_  
_

“I’m so sorry,” he repeats. 

_  
_

She scoffs and bites her lip. “You’re sorry?” 

_  
_

Ben knows those words are woefully inadequate. She straightens out her shirt, fixes her hair—all without meeting his eyes—and grabs her purse before heading out the door. For the second time in a week, Ben Solo watches Rey Kenobi walk out and he doesn’t run after her. Maybe this is what he deserves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/em_is_writing)


	3. Speak Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _ It’s been 84 years..._
> 
> I appreciate your patience with me and my slow-to-update behind. I hope this chapter more than makes up for it! 💕
> 
> Many thanks to commandercrouton for the beta read.

Pushing Ben away ranked among the hardest things Rey has ever had to do in her life. She knew she had to. If she hadn’t...well, she doesn’t want to think about that. She doesn’t want to think about how far she was willing to let him go. No matter how good it felt, no matter the amount of fireworks going off around them, the kiss couldn’t continue. It was disrespectful to Hux and Rey is not that kind of woman. 

Distance. That’s what they need. Ben probably just has cold feet. His relationship and subsequent engagement to Hux was  _ so  _ short. It’s only natural he’s having some doubts. Maybe he’s having some doubts about getting married. Maybe the doubts are about getting married to a man, it  _ is  _ his first time being with a man, after all. Rey only knows that she needs to remove herself from the equation before she thinks of herself as a homewrecker. 

The first day after Ben’s apartment, he texts her a few times, asking her to talk about what happened. She curtly replies that it was nothing and not to worry about. Her follow-up text reminds him to pick up the rings from the jeweler the next day. 

The next few days are just radio silent. It hurts, but it’s what needs to be done. 

The day of the wedding, Rey’s alarm goes off. A feeling of dread blooms in her stomach like a rancid flower and she remembers. It’s her best friend’s wedding day. Her best friend, Ben...who she’s in love with and is likely losing forever after today. She’s suddenly happy she suggested that Leia hire a bartender. She’ll need plenty of alcohol this evening. 

Rey goes about the motions of getting ready. She’s trying not to think too much, but somehow everything brings her thoughts back to Ben and what’s about to happen. Eating breakfast? It happens to be Ben’s favorite cereal. Doing her hair? She remembers he made an offhand comment while tipsy one night that he thinks she looks pretty when her hair is curled. It’s maddening and Rey hates it. 

Poe Dameron, who’s serving as the other witness for the wedding, is already at the courthouse when Rey shows up. He’s dressed very sharply— as per usual— in a navy blue suit. He buttons his suit jacket as he stands when Rey comes into view. 

“Hey!” he greets her with a friendly hug. “You heard from the guests of honor yet?” 

“Not yet,” she says, offering a weak smile. 

Poe nods and they fall into pleasant small talk. It’s enough to make Rey forget what they’re here for. 

“We’re here,” a voice from behind her says and that changes in a second. 

Rey has seen Ben in a suit before. They work together. It’s practically all she sees him in, but somehow  _ this _ suit—a blue pinstripe accented with a deep red tie—is enough to make her mouth dry and make her salivate all at once. Goddamnit why did he have to look so good on his wedding day? 

She manages to pull herself out of her lustful haze for long enough to see he’s flanked by Hux. Hux is dressed in a hunter green suit that sets his russet hair and beard off perfectly. His eyes are cast to the ground, avoiding looking at Poe at all costs. Rey knows there’s history between the two men. How deep it runs, she can’t say, but it must be epic if they can’t even look at each other. 

“So,” Ben begins, elongating the “o”, “is the judge ready for us?” 

“I think she’ll be ready for us in a few minutes,” Rey replies, picking at her cuticles. 

The next few moments are more awkward than a junior high dance. No one is looking at each other or talking to one another. The only sounds are the occasional footsteps of courthouse workers.  _ How many more minutes until the open bar?  _

“Sorry for the wait, guys. I’m Justice Holdo,” a slender, tall woman with purple hair says, poking her head out of the courtroom. 

Rey is slightly taken aback that a Justice of the Peace has purple hair, but there’s more pressing matters to attend to. Like a wedding that’s about to shatter Rey’s heart into a million pieces. 

They enter the courthouse and Poe and Rey stand off to the side while Hux and Ben take their spots in front of the judge. An overwhelming sensation of needing to cry overtakes Rey. It’s allegedly a happy day, so she can easily pass them off as happy tears. A tinge of guilt mixes into her emotions as well. This isn’t about her. This is Ben’s day. He’s happy. He’s found someone. Even if that someone isn’t her, she needs to be happy for him. 

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join these two men in marriage. Marriage is a solemn commitment and should not be entered into lightly. If anyone can show just cause why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace,” Justice Holdo begins. 

Rey isn’t sure if it was a trick of the imagination, but the justice’s eyes flicked over to her after the word “peace”. Is she that obvious? Poe shifts next to her and draws her attention. 

Justice Holdo smiles, looks down at her script and begins to speak again, but Poe’s voice cuts her off. 

“I object.”

Rey gasps.  _ No, no, no _ , she thinks,  _ no one is ruining this for my best friend _ . She places a hand on his arm. “Poe, stop. This isn’t one of your court cases.” 

Justice Holdo looks at the two of them and smiles. “That part is really just a formality, guys.” 

“We know,” Rey glares at Poe, “please continue.” 

“Rey, you don’t know the whole story,” Poe says, waving her off, not heeding Rey’s warnings. “Armie, I still love you. I know you don’t love him and he’s about as gay as I am straight.” 

“Says the man who plowed through an entire sorority before winter break,” Ben mumbles, not turning around.

“It’s called bisexuality, darling...look it up,” Poe says flippantly in Ben’s direction. 

“Poe!” Rey says, backhanding his arm, hoping it leaves a mark. “They’re happy! And what do you mean, I don’t know the whole story?” 

“Ben’s only marrying Hux so he doesn’t have to go back to England. It’s a green card marriage,” Poe says to Rey in an annoyed tone. 

“Okay, I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that and when you guys figure this out, someone come get me in my office,” Justice Holdo says, walking away. 

Rey is stunned by this revelation and it quickly turns to anger. Ben’s had plenty of chances to tell her the truth. Was she not worth his honesty? All of this heartache she’d been putting herself through in the name of calling herself a good friend, it could have been avoided by Ben just telling the truth. 

As her brain tries to process what’s just happened, she looks over and sees Poe pleading with Hux. She hears promises uttered and apologies proclaimed. Ben has stepped to the side and taken Poe’s place next to her. It’s taking all her willpower not to slap him. 

If Rey wasn’t so angry, she’d be delighted when Poe dropped down on one knee, asking Hux to spend the rest of his life with him. She might have even shed a few happy tears as Justice Holdo came back in the courtroom and they exchanged vows. All this happiness is transpiring around her, and all she can see is red. 

When it’s time to sign the marriage license as a witness, Rey nearly throws the pen at Ben after she’s done. She storms out of the courthouse, leaving him alone with the newlyweds. This time, Ben chases after her and grabs her arm when he catches up to her. 

“Rey, wait.” 

“No,” she says, flaring her nostrils and wrestling her arm out of his grasp. “Not now. I need a minute. I’ll see you for the party at your mom’s house.” 

She seems to be the only one who’s thinking of long term consequences because that sentence reminds her that someone should probably clue Leia in on what just happened. Rey arrives at Leia’s mansion shortly after storming away from the courthouse. Leia seems shocked, but not surprised. 

Her expansive lawn has been transformed to a nice scene for a party. White tables and chairs have been set out and Christmas lights have been strung up from the trees to cast the party in a soft glow. She’s still seeing red and can’t see the beauty around her. 

She manages to successfully avoid Ben for the majority of the party. People start to trickle in and the news begins to spread that they’re celebrating Hux and Poe’s wedding. No one really seems to care, however, there’s free food and drinks. 

She avoids Ben for as long as possible. She’s self-aware enough to realize that she might say something hurtful to him. Rey doesn’t want that on her conscience. 

Her plan succeeds until Leia asks her to deliver a check to the caterer. As she leaves the kitchen, she practically runs into Ben. 

“I’d rather not do this now,” she says with a sigh, trying to brush past him. 

“Me too,” he says, following her, “but...we need to talk, Rey.” 

She walks into the sunroom and turns to face him. “Okay, so talk.” 

“I…,” he begins, running a hand through his hair, “don’t even know where to start.” 

“How about the fact that you didn’t tell me the truth about this arrangement?” 

He huffs out a breath. “I meant to tell you.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Honestly, I did.” 

She rolls her eyes. “You could have fooled me.” 

“I’m sorry.”

She groans. “I don’t get you. We’re friends, Ben! Best friends! You could have told me!” 

“It had to look real,” he says defensively. 

“So you couldn’t tell me?” 

He huffs out a breath and runs his fingers through his hair. She can see he’s uncomfortable and just wants this interrogation to end. “Why is this so important to you?” 

“Because I’m love with you!” she practically screams. 

He straightens at her revelation. “What?” 

_ Fuck.  _ This is not how she wanted to tell him, amidst screams and shouts. But here they were. Her secret is out. No more hiding. No more pretending. He knows. “I’ve been in love with you for five years. There it is. Now that I’ve sufficiently humiliated myself…”

She doesn’t bother to finish her sentence. She just walks away, out of the house and back to the party. Ben’s footsteps hurry to catch up with her and he grabs her wrist before she can walk too far. His gaze pierces her. “Where do you think you’re going?” 

“Why do you care?” she looks away from him, tears glistening in her eyes. 

“You can’t just say something like that to me and walk away,” he says as he places a crooked finger under her chin and tilts her head upward. 

“Why?” she scoffs. “What are you gonna do about it?” 

Before Rey can fully process what’s happening, he’s cupping his hands around her face and his lips meet hers in the sweetest, most intense kiss she’s ever known. When they’d kissed in Ben’s apartment, they were both holding back, a fact Rey was quickly beginning to realize. This kiss was miles from that. 

Ben had always been an intense person and his kisses and attention are no different. He makes Rey feel like this is the only kiss that ever was or will be. He hoists her up into his arms and she wraps her legs around his torso. Her dress is exposing a dangerous amount of skin, but that doesn’t matter. She wants Ben to touch her everywhere. She’s waited too long for this moment and she’ll be damned if she’ll let a little amount of modesty ruin this. 

“Tell me you’re sorry.” 

Ben has backed her into a wall and nips at her pulse point with the right amount of suction that straddles the line between pain and pleasure. The fact that Ben marked her and is claiming her as his own makes Rey’s cunt throb even more. She needs  _ everything _ . Now. 

“If I have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you like this? I’ll gladly do so.” 

“Fair.” 

One of Ben’s hands slides further up her thigh and Rey grabs it to bring it where she needs it most. 

“No,” Ben says, resisting. “Not right here.” 

“Ben.  _ Please _ ,” her voice comes out needy and pleading. 

“Sweetheart, I’d lower you to the floor, have my way with you and not come up for air until Sunday if I could, but all my mom’s stuffy friends are out there,” he says as he puts her down. 

“What do you suggest?” 

He looks around for a brief moment before swooping her up in a bridal carry and heading toward the stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m on Twitter! @em_is_writing


	4. Lover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I'm so sorry this took forever. IRL stuff was dragging me down and it was bleeding out into this fic. Fortunately, that's (mostly) resolved now and I was able to deliver unto you this final chapter. Thank you all for coming along on this journey with these two idiots. 
> 
> Also, huge thank you to [CommanderCrouton](https://archiveofourown.org/users/commandercrouton) for being a beta extraordinaire.

__Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?  
With every guitar string scar on my hand  
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my  
Lover  
My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue  
All's well that ends well to end up with you  
Swear to be over-dramatic and true to my  
Lover

_ -**Taylor Swift, "Lover"** _

Rey can’t believe this is actually happening. When they reach the top of the steps, Ben sets her down and pulls he in for yet another kiss. She can’t get enough. She’s addicted. She wants someone to pinch her if she’s dreaming. On second thought, does she actually want to wake up? As they back into the first bedroom they can find, she decides if this is a dream, she wants to keep living in it forever. She slips off her heels and her feet are glad for the relief. 

Ben shucks his suit jacket and it falls to the floor. He cups her face with his hands for just a moment, staring at her with equal parts wonder and lust. It’s downright sinful and precious—an oxymoron of the highest caliber. She would give him a penny for his thoughts right now, to see if he’s having the same thoughts as she is. 

_ I can’t believe this is happening.  _

“Me too,” Ben breathes as he nips at her jawline and Rey realizes she’s said the words out loud. Goosebumps rise on her skin from his whispered admission in her ear. A blush spreads across her chest, but the fact that Ben finds this as far-fetched as her is a small comfort. 

He slowly turns her around, wrapping a warm hand across her belly. His other hand slides up the curve of her hips to just below her breast before it slides up to the top of her zipper. She barely registers the sound as Ben adorns her newly-exposed skin with kisses.

His lips ghost against her ear, nuzzling it once more. “Ever since I saw you in this dress at Maz’s, all I’ve been able to think about is taking this off.” 

An incoherent sound escapes from her that could only be described as a whimper. 

The dress falls to the floor, the jeweled belt making a  _ clunk _ as it hits the ground. Rey grabs Ben’s neck as they back up toward the bed, pressing a hungry kiss to his lips. She’s been starved for this man for so long, and she can’t get enough. The pleasure she’s denied herself for so long is just within reach and she’ll be damned if she’s not going to kiss him and have him worship every inch of her. She flops down on the bed, ready to receive as Ben moves to hover over her. 

He plants barely there kisses along her calf as he bends it. She hasn’t realized it until this moment, but the air from the room hits her and a chill engulfs her body. She becomes acutely aware of a damp patch on her underwear, already eager for his ministrations. Rey closes her eyes as Ben surveys her. This is not how she thought today would be going. Her thoughts center around wishing she’d put on a sexier pair of underwear. 

Ben’s eyes widen just a hair. “You’re...you’re wet already.” 

“Five years,” Rey replies sheepishly, lifting her hand to gnaw at her thumb. 

He brings his head down to her ear. She can feel him smirking as he speaks. “Then I guess we’ll just have to take our time.” 

Rey’s breath hitches as he sucks at her pulse point. She can feel herself dampen more and she’s wondering how this is possible from just his touch. 

His caress moves lower as he pins her arms above her head. He nuzzles the soft flesh under her breast with his nose and Rey squirms in response. Ben’s hands stilling her have heightened every sensation. 

She doesn’t know if it’s the illusion she can’t relieve the growing pressure between her legs, but it’s making her thirst for his cock grow exponentially. Ben does absolutely nothing to help when he swirls his tongue on her hardened nipple and sucks in quick succession. 

“Please,” she whimpers. It comes out more needy and breathy than she intended. 

Ben flashes her a devilish smile around her nipple. “All in good time, sweetheart.” 

Her hips writhe against the bed as he begins moving down her abdomen, first with his finger—tracing the curves of her muscles. His mouth quickly follows, stopping just short of where she needs relief.

When he finally dips his head down between her legs, he blows a cool stream of air on her glistening folds. It sets off a new waves of moans and pleas from Rey. 

In all her years of pining for Ben, she’d allowed herself to fantasize about what this moment would be like. There were times when she was so frustrated, the only thing that could relieve anything was a toy or her fingers. The image of him worshiping her cunt with his tongue, filling her with his thick fingers and cock brought Rey her release more times than she would readily admit to. 

The one comfort Rey allowed herself in the times where she was too chicken shit to tell Ben her feeling was that the fantasy of something was often better than reality. Ben couldn’t be  _ that  _ good in bed. He was a nice guy. Nice guys didn’t kiss you or finger you like that. 

_ Oh yes they fucking do,  _ Rey thinks as Ben presses a searing kiss to her lips and slips a finger in her. One soon becomes two. Two becomes three and Rey feels stretched to her limits. The slight pain gives way to more ripples of pleasure washing over her body. 

She can feel she’s close. Ben must feel it too since he withdraws his fingers. Rey doesn’t feel it at first, but a crinkling noise brings her out of her haze for just a moment. 

For just a brief moment, Rey gets a look at the both of them. Ben’s dress pants are halfway down his knees—the expensive fabric crumpled from their passion—and he’s fumbling with a condom. The most expensive dress Rey’s ever owned is equally in a state—lying in a pile on the floor. 

_ What a hot mess,  _ Rey silently laughs to herself as Ben centers himself over her. There’s no one else she’d rather be a hot mess with. 

Five years of longing, hoping, and wishing,  _ finally  _ come to an end as Ben pushes into her slowly and reverantly. She hisses and he stills. 

“Ben,” she breathes, “don’t stop.” 

He complies, easing out slowly. He sets a rhythm—slow, but still no less passionate. Rey’s hips buck up to meet his with each thrust. Soon, she’s taken in every glorious inch of him. It surpasses all of her fantasies. 

The liquid warmth that had been pooling in her belly now engulfs her entire body. She doesn’t think she’s capable of coherent thoughts right now other than  _ don’t stop  _ and  _ harder _ . Her release bubbles to the surface of her skin. 

She doesn’t know what tips her over—maybe it’s the angle, maybe it’s culmination of everything—everything in her vision goes white and a voice, she’s not even sure is hers, escapes from her, uttering cries and praises. Her vision slowly returns in the afterglow. Her legs have never been so shaky, nor has she ever felt so satisfied. Ben flops down next to her. They’re equally sweaty, ruddy-faced, and catching their breath. 

A few silent, contented moments pass before Ben speaks. “We should probably get back.” 

A throaty chuckle escapes Rey. “You’re right.” 

They attempt to put themselves back together—hiding any evidence of their tryst. It doesn’t stop the whispers when they return to the party—hand in hand—after a twenty minute absence. They don’t seem to care. They dance the night away and barely stray more than a few feet from each other. 

Later that night at Ben’s apartment, they more than make up for the years they spent being stupid (their words). They leave no part of each other’s bodies unexplored, with Ben intending to make good on his promise of not having her come up for air until Sunday. 

For tonight, however, the limits of their bodies beg for sleep. Rey’s breathing has begun to return to a normal pace after the last bits of their shared orgasm begins to fade. 

She rolls on her side, Ben molding his body to fit hers.

“I love you, Ben.” 

“I love you, Rey,” are the last words she hears before she drifts off to sleep. It’s all she’s ever wanted to hear from him. 

***

One year later, Ben shifts in his spot. The waters of Boston Harbor behind him—serenely churning around, the seagulls cawing as they soar. Inside, Ben feels like he’s about to throw up, but it’s not entirely unpleasant. He wouldn’t rather be anywhere else but standing under the rotunda, the fragrances of the sunflower floral arrangements hitting his nose on the breeze. There’s no place he’d rather be—ready to puke his guts out—with the golden hour fast approaching, his wedding guests chattering expectantly. 

“Weird sense of deja vu, eh?” Hux claps a hand on his shoulder. 

Ben shakes his head and lets out a chuckle, glad for the relief of his best friend’s joke. “You could say that.”

“It turned out for the best,” Hux says, nodding toward his husband. 

Ben hums in agreement as he watches Poe attempt to wrangle Brendol, one of Hux and Poe’s twins. “I never thanked you guys for paying for the honeymoon.” 

“It’s the least we could do,” Hux replies wistfully, only focusing on the part of his family seated among the guests. 

The din of the crowd lowers as the first few notes of  _ Canon in D _ break through the late afternoon air, courtesy of the string quartet assembled in the back of the rotunda. 

Rey’s friend, Rose Tico-Abrams, is first down the aisle in her pink floor-length dress, as matron-of-honor. Her two year-old son, Matt—whose walk down the aisle could be described as more of a run—toddles after his mother. Matt was more than a little eager to wear a grey suit that matched Ben and Hux and perform his ring bearer duties. At the rehearsal dinner, he’d been running around with the typical energy of a toddler and had informed Ben he only wanted to be called “Ring Man”, as if he was a superhero. 

He slows down at the urging of his mother. Rose also directs him to lift up the sign he’d been holding down at his side— _ Uncle Ben...here comes your girl _ , it reads. Matt is followed by Poe and Hux’s other child, Shara. She’s shier than Matt, walking at a slower pace, hesitantly scattering the yellow sunflower petals on the white runner that lines the brick walkway. Poe has stuck his head out into the middle of the aisle, encouraging his daughter—who decides to stop short of the wedding party to sit in her father’s lap. 

A silence descends upon the scene as the anticipation in the air grows thicker. The women guest silently look at each other with excited looks. Justice Holdo—as if there was anyone else who could marry them—asks all the guests to stand. Ben steadies himself with a slow breath (in and out) as all rise to their feet. 

The first notes of the Bridal March play and everyone simultaneously turns their back on Ben in anticipation of Rey’s arrival. She turns the corner from the main building and onto the brick road, on her friend Finn’s arm. Everything in his peripheral vision turns hazy, except for her as she floats toward him. 

She’s wearing a white dress with lace. That’s all he knows. He doesn’t know what style it is or what kind of fabric it’s composed of. All he knows is that he’s the luckiest son of a bitch in the world right now. How he convinced her to marry him after the past year’s shenanigans is beyond him. He will never question how the universe saw fit to bring them together and mold their lives into one. He won’t waste a single breath on it. 

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this man and woman in matrimony,” Justice Hold launches into her familiar monologue. “Marriage is a solemn commitment and should not be entered into lightly. If anyone can show just cause why these two shouldn’t be married, speak now or forever hold your peace.” 

With one mind, Ben and Rey turn their heads to look back at Poe in jest. Other guests have begun to do the same. 

“What?” Poe just shrugs, met with laughter from the guests who are in on the joke. 

Ben looks back at his bride with a smile and she’s beaming right back at him. He remembers that Rey once told him that he life was defined by being a day late and a dollar short. Right now, her face tells him she knows those days are long gone. She’s right where she’s supposed to be. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

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